Monday 9 February 2015

When God says Wait


I discovered something a couple of weeks ago. And it's this - my most productive writing is done between 10 and 11 at night. You might wonder how, after writing seriously for the past four years, I've only just discovered that. It's easy really - I'm usually asleep then. With two little kids who've only recently decided to sleep past 6am (yay for 'sleeping in'! An extra thirty minutes anyway...) and a disease which tends to make me pay for skimping on sleep, I'm usually in bed by 10pm. Until I realised that I could write 4 times as many words with far less effort at 10pm than I could at any other time during the day. And sleep much better because of it.
 
Whether it's the lack of distractions or the fact that my brain has already switched off for the night giving the characters free rein to do whatever they like, the words flow and I just write. It's easy. Effortless almost. It's like I'm watching a movie in my mind and I'm just writing what I see and hear.

And yet, I can sit for an hour during the day, even when my kids are asleep and there are no distractions, and force out a whole 300 words, most of which I end up rewriting (or deleting) later. I occasionally wonder why I bother...

Timing is everything.

I remember thinking the same thing so many times over the years as I’ve tried to make things happen instead of waiting for God. When I think he’s moving too slow or maybe I should help him along a bit – and all I get is tired, grumpy, and the feeling that I’ve been completely foolish. Again. Like when I decided to take it into my own hands to find myself a boyfriend rather than waiting for God. I won’t say God laughed at my pathetic attempts (because I’m sure he’s much too loving to do that!) but he would have been justified. I think it’s pretty funny myself ... now.

God’s timing is perfect.

We can spend years of our lives forcing things to happen, thinking God has forgotten us when all he's waiting for is the right time. When all the pieces he’s holding onto come together. I have this picture in my head of God as an artist, getting all the pieces ready for his masterpiece. Only they’re not all ready at the same time. One piece just needs cutting out, another painting. Another a coat of varnish after the paint. The first piece sits there, wondering why it’s taking so long. “I’m ready,” it thinks. It doesn’t realise that the one with the varnish still needs to dry before they can all be joined together in the great masterpiece.

Wait. And trust. God knows what he's doing.

I'm not saying we should always just be sitting around waiting for God to do what he's already asked of us, or that there aren't times when it's the right time despite being tough. I still sit down and write every day (ok, most days!) for an hour or so because I want to write a book. But I've learnt that that time during the day is better used editing, plotting, typing my handwritten notes, doing research or learning about writing rather than coming up with much. Then, late at night, I can just write.

Maybe that's part of the waiting on God's timing - the preparation bit. Being there, praying, learning, studying, allowing him to work in us, so that when the time is right, we will be ready.

If God's asking you to wait, or if he simply seems silent, then wait. Be patient. All the forcing of his plan will simply wear you out. When the time is right, God will bring it all together. Of that I have no doubt.
 

Ps. Tried cooking damper again today. New recipe, new disaster. I give in. Damper wins.

 

2 comments:

  1. :) thank you Hannah your words are wise and appreciated.

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    1. You're very welcome :) Love that my disastrous dampers are being redeemed as people are encouraged by the story!

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